the best part about blogging is that no one actually knows if youre naked or not
No I am not a Hobbit.
is pushing people away considered a special talent because i think i’m really good at it
Sometimes I think to myself, “do I really want to buy another chocolate bar?”
And then I remember that there is a super volcano under Yellowstone that is 40,000 years overdue and when it erupts it could potentially cover most if north America in ash and create a volcanic winter that kills half the worlds population
And I’m like, fuck yeah I want that chocolate bar
This person has the most real values to date
why do people have quiet respectful funerals when i die i want my ashes mixed with glitter and packed tightly into a coffin and then they blow up the coffin with explosives so glitter rains down on the guests while blasting “thanks for the memories” by fall out boy
my dance style ranges from white dad at a barbecue to stripper whose rent is due tomorrow
Spent the weekend with my dying grandfather, only to come home and have a massive family fight. My grandma with dementia ran away from her rest home, turned up on our door step and claiming we don’t love her anymore. And to add a cherry to the pile of shit I’m working late tonight.